I looked. I dreamed. I considered. I almost committed to an amazing cruise around the British Isles, but in the end – nothing. I walked away. The glossy pages of the tourist brochures are already dusty and my inbox continues to fill with emails from the newsletter and information offers that I signed up for. The vacation investigation project wasn’t procrastination. I am a veteran procrastinator so I know all about that. What prevented me from making the leap of committing, of making reservations and writing a check, etc. was uncertainty about the future.
There are different types of dreams. There
are pie-in-the-sky dreams. There are also dreams with a reasonable possibility
of achievement. And there are dreams that serve a purpose (i.e. to get away
from reality for a little while, or dreams that are like a virtual B&B that
you mentally run away to for a few hours). My vacation dreams are definitely of
the do-able variety but I lack the certainty of what life in the near future will
be. My mom needs extra attention right now. I’m struggling to balance the day
job with my writing job and family needs. Sometimes you can put real-life on
hold and just go, but it’s not that way for me right now.
Do I regret spending time planning a trip
I’m not taking? Do I wish I had the time back that I spent doing research? No,
most definitely not.
There’s a part of my brain that thrives
in my imagination, and it’s enjoying that lovely cruise – at least the prospect
of it. The memories created in chewing over of the facts, of envisioning the
ship and the sights – are like a trip unto itself. Not as much fun as the real
thing, but still something, and, in the end, I have to ask myself: what would
be my greatest regret? That I didn’t take the trip? Or that I wasn’t here when
my mom needed me? No question there.
So, for now, instead of taking a dream
vacation, I’ll continue dreaming. But don’t
be surprised if one of my characters in an upcoming book takes a lovely cruise
around the British Isles or spends a couple of weeks in an oceanfront house in
the Outer Banks – after all, the research and planning is already done and, for
a virtual dream of a trip, the packing is a breeze.
Beautifully written, Grace. Those dreamed-only vacations are so important - sometimes, they are the only break or recharge we can get to help us keep going. As you said, much easier to pack for! And with my mother gone, now, my dream vacations are often of the time I spent with her - no cruise could ever replace that.
ReplyDeleteVery well said. The trips will always be there. Family may not. You have to do whats right for you. For a much smaller body and mind renewal you can go to the local spa. Get a massage while listening to your favorite books or music. Your imagination can be your vacation for now.
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by, Lola. The massage is such a great idea!
DeleteVery well said. The trips will always be there. Family may not. You have to do whats right for you. For a much smaller body and mind renewal you can go to the local spa. Get a massage while listening to your favorite books or music. Your imagination can be your vacation for now.
ReplyDeleteI also dream of that great vacation Grace, but family is always there first and finances too. So I too dream and look at my Travel Guides to states I want to visit and think maybe someday!
ReplyDeleteI'm with you, Delene. Maybe someday. But the dreams are fun, aren't they?
DeleteBeautiful post, Grace! Keep on dreaming and cherish the time spent with your mom.
ReplyDeleteWhat's nice about reading a book is that I can travel a lot of places through the story.
ReplyDeleteWe are able to go on vacation, but I understand your sentiments. Both hubby and I have elderly parents who are managing in their own homes right now, but we are very aware that is not going to continue for long without a lot of help. Life will change for us soon. We're even planning to move house to be closer so we are there to help and give support.
ReplyDeleteVery relatable post. I've been there and even now have to put off dream vacation ideas because of life's uncertainties. I'm so grateful for the Internet, TV, and books because I can at least get a secondhand thrill. And at least there's no packing and airplane anxiety involved.
ReplyDeleteYou also get to sleep in your own bed after virtual travel, right? I spend a lot of time exploring through the internet.
DeleteGrace, it is a difficult time when you are caring for a loved one. We took care of my mother-in-law for a couple of years when her health was not good. Thankfully, we were able to take our planned cruise because my brother-in-law and my husband's aunt came to stay with my mother-in-law. I hope all goes well with your mother and that you get to take that cruise one day.
ReplyDeleteI could very much relate to your post, Grace! When I didn't have the money to go skiing, the my heroine in my next book became a skiing teacher and went skiing all day long! I hope your mother will soon feel better! Hugs!
ReplyDeleteGrace, my current dream vacation is a land tour of the British Isles! One of these days I'm going to make it, too. It's on my current bucket list.
ReplyDeleteGrace, my dream is Egypt!! Unfortunately, my parents were stuck there during the uprising, so my husband is saying that I'll never travel there. :( It was a tense few weeks trying to get them out.
ReplyDeleteGrace, my dream is Egypt!! Unfortunately, my parents were stuck there during the uprising, so my husband is saying that I'll never travel there. :( It was a tense few weeks trying to get them out.
ReplyDelete