Saturday, March 28, 2015

Adapting to Change - by Magdalena Scott

"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves." ~Victor Frankl

I've spent some time with old photographs lately, particularly ones my husband was in. We have a wonderful community foundation, and a talented intern is putting together biographical videos of some of the people who are memorialized by funds at the foundation.

My son and daughter-in-law and I have shed tears over the story of his life, which I wrote and they tweaked. (I always need a great editor or two.) They've helped assemble the pictures we submitted to the intern. I appreciate her hard work on this, and my kids' help, and I know it will be a wonderful tribute that many people will enjoy watching--even if there are tears.

Life has changed dramatically since his diagnosis in 2009, and death in 2012. We've adapted to a series of changes, found things to be grateful for, taken paths we couldn't have anticipated. Several times when looking through those pictures, I'd stop and look into the eyes of my former self. What an easy life that young woman had.

In my former life, I was a change-resister. I'd dig my heels in and refuse to budge. "But this is the way we've always done it." Goodness! Now when I hear that sentence, I cringe. Now, in fact, I'm likely to do things out of the ordinary in part just because it's different. I'm not sure I would even want to spend time with the "old" me. What a stick-in-the-mud.

More Adaptable Me says:

  • Why not let myself date a great guy?
  • Why not quit my job and write full time?
  • Why not give my cat his own column in my newsletter?
  • Why not eat at the restaurant I've never heard of?
  • watch the movie?
  • listen to the music?
  • take the class?
  • Why not get my hair cut off super short even though my "signature" look is big cotton ball hair?

I've learned, and likely you have too, there's no guarantee that today's normal will be available tomorrow. Sometimes I take a break from current life and simply ponder change.

  • What if I sold my Jeep and lived car-free?
  • What if I gave away/sold the few things that survived our big auction and lived with even less?
  • What if I moved to another

I think that learning to adapt to change has made me a stronger and happier person.

What about you? Do you avoid change, or try to embrace it?

Was it always that way, or did a life event alter your outlook?


P.S. I hope you like this picture I took last summer, of Queen Anne's lace. It's considered a weed, but I've always thought it lovely. So far, that field is still just a field, but that could change too.


Magdalena Scott writes small town sweet romance novels. Learn about her books, read her blog, subscribe to her newsletter, see her big cotton ball hair, and connect on social media by visiting her website:

Want to keep up with news from Sweet Romance Reads authors?
Sign up for the Sweet Romance Reads newsletter today.


  1. What a wonderful post Magdalena and a good lesson your are teaching us. Yes life can change overnight. I often doubt I will be able to cope. I like my surroundings and what I do. Maybe I should learn not to get attached to materialistic things.

    1. Thank you, Mona. Guess what? I still struggle with being attached to the things I kept, but I hope to eventually get to the point of being able to let it all go if necessary--without regret. There is a great post about this on one of my favorite minimalist blogs:

  2. Magdalena, this is a great reminder to focus on what's important -- memories of your husband, time with your son and daughter-in-law, new experiences instead of new things. It sounds joyous.

    1. Patti, there are still plenty of difficulties, but yes, I think you're right. We are finding ways to be joyous.

  3. Magdalena, your post was very thought provoking. Sometimes I think I'm a person who embraces change, other times not. I moved a lot in my life, so change came with every move. I hate change when it comes to computers. Why did they change the way a program worked? Now I have to learn something new.

    1. Merrillee, I'm with you on the computer thing. "They" keep telling us it's important to learn new things. Sometimes I agree--like my laptop's touch screen--but sometimes I grumble for a long time. :)

      Moving a lot, as you have done, would definitely shake things up at intervals. A good idea!

  4. Thank you for a wonderful post, Magdalena. Change is difficult for many people, but I think the hardest change is in the way a person thinks and that is what you covered perfectly. BTW my favorite quote by Victor Frankl is the one where he states that the one freedom no one can ever take away from you is the power to think for yourself and form your own opinions.

    1. Is this it, Denise? "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way."